I'm back! I can't believe how long it's been since I last posted. Where to begin? Job losses, jobs found, health issues...

We've been around the bend, that's for sure. Tony had a time of it finding work after he was laid off July of 2012. He found a couple of jobs, and then lost them. We were blessed in March 12-19, 2013 with a trip to Tampa to visit our son Austin and his girlfriend. We had a great time and miss them terribly. I started working for Comfort Keepers and Tony got a job shortly after that and we've both been working steadily until last November when I tripped at work and injured my knee. I've been out of work since December 6th.

Then I had the opportunity last year, 2013, to help my mom and dad while my mom was recuperating from surgery. Kept dad company while mom was in the hospital and helping them get ready for her to come home.

I've been keeping busy, as you can see. But what I haven't touched on is what I've been thinking this whole time about our adoption, or lack thereof.

I guess it hit me pretty hard about a year ago that things keep getting stonewalled, we take a step forward and end up stepping back three feet, and it makes me wonder what's going on. I, at that point, had to pray and let the girls go. No not entirely, if the opportunity presented/presents itself for us to attempt to move forward again we'd pick up where we left off, but realistically, we don't see that happening. And that hurts, A LOT! We will always think of them as our daughters, Hannah and Grace (Sandra and Slavka), they are to this day in our prayers, that they find a loving home and are cherished as much as we would have.

I often look back over the past five years and wonder 'what the heck, why, Lord, did we go through all of this? Why'd we leave Louisville? Why do I have a heart to adopt children with special needs if you aren't allowing us to adopt? And then I look around at what we've been doing and what we've been through and I get it. We apparently came back because we were needed here, and I couldn't have done what I needed to do here if I had adopted the twins. God Knows, we don't...

So, I guess we'll continue this journey after things settle down a little with family health...in the meantime, I'll spend my time advocating for my friends that adopt or want to adopt children with special needs...if you know someone, let me know!

Until next time...

Repurposing...For Now...

After my birthday in May, we had a wonderful shower for my son's fiance in June! I had a lot of help from some very dear friends...and it went off without a hitch and she was wonderfully surprised!!!

Then there was July...

I was supposed to go to Washington DC for the National Down Syndrome Conference to meet a friend and help her out watching her two sons while she attended the conference. I was so totally looking forward to going, even had my ticket to go, but ended up not going at the last minute due to a severe migraine...Day 3 of 5 that particular month :(  . I could see myself on the bus for 3 hours, getting sick or lost in NYC and then facing another 5 hours to DC, only to have to walk a few blocks to the hotel and then to still have a headache and nausea the next morning. Not my idea of being any kind of help or company. I just prayed she would understand. Disappointment #1 in July.

Disappointment #2 came a week later when Tony lost his job. So, here we find ourselves, once again, with our adoption ON HOLD. This is one heck of a test of our faith, let me tell you!

Our August was difficult as unemployment is tough, going without any kind of pay for a month. Our oldest son Chris was married to Terri on August 18th with Tony officiating! That was a blessing as were all of our friends that participated.

We just finished getting through September, and I have been trying to decide how to use our blog to bless others while we wait on our Lord to bless us with our adoption. So, since it is October 1st and October is Down Syndrome Awareness Month, I think I will try to blog everyday. I have decided to focus on at least 2 moms I know that have agreed to allow me to share their story. I will start tomorrow!

Today is just to update you and ask for your prayers for our beautiful girls in Serbia. Pray that either they have been scooped up already and are living with a family that cherishes them as much as we do (and that He has just the right child waiting there for us), or that God is protecting them from harm, preserving them for us on that day that we can scoop them up in our arms to love and protect them with our love.

Thanks and God Bless!

And Yet Another Celebration!

We just celebrated a landmark in our history on May 20th, and will again on September 19th...a 50th Birthday! We really can't wait to celebrate another landmark in our family history other than anniversaries and 50th birthdays, the celebration of new editions to our family! So these are the times we celebrate until then...

My Birthday was Sunday. My parents and sister planned a party for me...for years I said I was 29, or 39 depending on how old my oldest was...I am only going to admit this one time...from now on "age is just a number and mines unlisted!" Just remember that next time you think to ask! ;D

Here is the table setting at my parents home

My cake and balloon holder :)
here is a close up of my cake...notice the Pink Panther? Mom said he was looking for my youth!


Here is my gift from Tony, a cordless drill and bits!!! Yes, I LOVED that!!! I was not the least bit offended...


Small gift from mom...'How the #*@!! did i get to be 50!!' is what it says!!! Way too funny!!! And some money that will be used at Hobby Lobby!!!


Here is my beautiful stained glass Tiffany Butterfly lamp from my sister!!! It is absolutely gorgeous! I always wanted a Tiffany lamp!


Here is a plate to commemorate my day!


And blowing out the candles...can any of you guess what my wish was???? Starts with a g and ends with irls!! And remember, I am now 43...for the moment anyway! :)

More Things We Celebrate...While Waiting!

We celebrated our 27th Anniversary on May 10th! This is quite exciting for us! I am just hoping that we can celebrate our anniversary together with our (almost) complete family sometime in the near future! I would love to have our sons and soon to be daughter(s) accompanying us to renew our vows!! What a wonderful day that will be!!

Until then, this is what happened...

We have started attending a church in Hartford called Redeemer Hill. It's a church plant which, if you know Tony and I at all, church planting is in our hearts. So they have a 'small group' ministry they call community groups. We attend one that meets in East Hartford. It's a great group...it's small and intimate, one where you really get to know the others well. We had no idea, and neither did another couple, that they decided to bless us and the other couple, Brad and Taylor, with gift cards to our favorite restaurants to help us celebrate our anniversaries!!

That was a huge blessing for us and enabled us to go to dinner to USS Chowder Pot on our anniversary! Here are some pics...



We really can't wait to really celebrate our anniversary in the future with vow renewal and everything...in a couple of years!

Things We Celebrate...

So our son Chris is now engaged to his girlfriend Terri and they are supposed to be married in August. Along with gaining a daughter in law we will be gaining a grandson too! His name is Alex. We were invited to Alex's birthday party last weekend...I thought I'd share some pics...and yes we are excited!

We had a great time meeting new people and getting to see what Alex is like...

Enjoy the rest of your weekend!

Helping Friends...

This post is to help a friend of mine, Gillian Marchenko, to get her book published! Here is Gillian's intro on her blog.

 My name is Gillian. I am a Christian, wife, mother, writer, and speaker. I’m also a small town girl from Michigan who has spent the majority of her married life in big cities; Kiev, Ukraine for three and a half years church planting, and now Chicago, where I live with my husband Sergei and our four daughters; Elaina, Zoya, Polly and Evangeline. Polly and Evangeline both have Down syndrome. Evie, the youngest of the girls, came to us through international adoption from Ukraine in 2009.
Most Sundays, you’ll find me there in the back row of the church Sergei pastors, bouncing a toddler on my knee and giving the older girls /the look/. It’s been said that wives of clergy live in fish bowls. Let me be the first to tell you that my bowl is cracked and most of the water has seeped out.
I love good reads, yoga, stringing words together, speaking Russian, eating peanut butter out of the can with a spoon, and advocating for my girls with special needs.

She is quite an amazing woman with a wonderful story of adoption just waiting to be published. Please help her to become published by just clicking the link below and hit the like button!

 http://www.facebook.com/GillianMarchenkoPage

And here is her blog page:

 http://www.gillianmarchenko.com/

I cannot wait to read her book! Please help her out by liking her blog...

This Seems Fun!

As we are planning our homestudy details, dossier, and travels, we are also trying to plan for their arrival. We are looking into furniture and clothing.

I came across Zulily, a website of all kinds of items for children. By sending invites, all you have to do is to sign up for a free account. I thought if you were interested, here is a link that may, at least for today, help me earn $15 toward my purchases for the girls. Here is my personal link:

http://www.zulily.com/invite/jstancil229

Thanks for reading and considering!

Welcome To Holland

I love this poem, and I can truly say we are ready if God wants us to be in Holland instead of Italy...

"Welcome to Holland"
I am often asked to describe the experience of raising a child with a disability - to try to help people who have not shared that unique experience to understand it, to imagine how it would feel. It's like this: When you're going to have a baby, it's like planning a fabulous vacation trip - to Italy. You buy a bunch of guide books and make your wonderful plans. The Coliseum. The Michelangelo David. The gondolas in Venice. You may learn some handy phrases in Italian. It's all very exciting. After months of eager anticipation, the day finally arrives. You pack your bags and off you go. Several hours later, the plane lands. The stewardess comes in and says, "Welcome to Holland." "Holland?!?" you say. "What do you mean Holland?? I signed up for Italy! I'm supposed to be in Italy. All my life I've dreamed of going to Italy." But there's been a change in the flight plan. They've landed in Holland and there you must stay. The important thing is that they haven't taken you to a horrible, disgusting, filthy place, full of pestilence, famine and disease. It's just a different place. So you must go out and buy new guide books. And you must learn a whole new language. And you will meet a whole new group of people you would never have met. It's just a different place. It's slower-paced than Italy, less flashy than Italy. But after you've been there for a while and you catch your breath, you look around.... and you begin to notice that Holland has windmills....and Holland has tulips. Holland even has Rembrandts. But everyone you know is busy coming and going from Italy... and they're all bragging about what a wonderful time they had there. And for the rest of your life, you will say "Yes, that's where I was supposed to go. That's what I had planned." And the pain of that will never, ever, ever, ever go away... because the loss of that dream is a very, very significant loss. But... if you spend your life mourning the fact that you didn't get to Italy, you may never be free to enjoy the very special, the very lovely things ... about Holland. - Emily Pearl Kingsley

And Again...The Journey Begins!

So, over the past week some information has come to light regarding the adoption process. Some good, some not so good. I will get into details perhaps when we go private on this blog...which will be soon, we'll see.

I have been in contact with the country that we are beginning our process with and we have been 'invited' to complete and send our homestudy to them.

So here is the plan:

The hiccup with unemployment and job change will hold us up for a bit...so hopefully we will begin our international homestudy in June or July. The social worker stated it will take around 3 months to complete it and get us a copy. That is fine because the country we are adopting from closes from June through September. That will be plenty of time for us to complete it and then send it.

In the meantime:

 File for our passports

We need to file a I600 or I600-A, I can't remember, with the USCIS.

Federal finger prints

Compiling all of our documents together, have necessary documents appostilled.

Compile documents into a dossier format.

Send dossier to country for translation and approval.

And in between all that, we need to choose a child or sibling set (or group).

Our hope and prayer is to have a child/children in our house by this time next year...whether it is the set of twins that brought us this far, and it can be, or a little girl with DS...we really do want add to our family!

I am planning on going private soon, so if you are interested in following along, please let me know so I can send you an invite!

God Bless!

New Year, New Changes, New Promises...

I can't believe how long it's been since I blogged. Way too long, I know. Many changes are on the horizon...and they all promise to be very exciting...but let me catch you up.

First, in July, we went to Louisville to see our son Cale and for Tony to have an interview. The interview went well but the guy wouldn't commit to a job until Tony moved. Well, we aren't going to move unless he has a job, soooo...we didn't move. We had a good visit with Cale and learned we missed living there, a little.

Then, we've been patiently waiting on God to make necessary changes to complete our adoption plans.

October:

We had the worst blizzard in Connecticut and power was out for 6 days.

Tony was asked if he would move back to the Manchester Monro store to straighten it out. His RM fired the manager of that store, manager for over 25 years, and the store went down hill from there. They wanted him to turn the store around to make it a million dollar store asap, that is what it was when they fired the manager. Tony tried.

We found out that our landlord was a worse person than we originally thought...we started looking at housing changes quickly after that.

November:

Although Tony moved back to Manchester to work, it was a lesson in futility...he kept trying to bring that store back, the pressure to succeed was huge, stress was increased. We just kept praying and trusting...

Kept looking for an apartment. Kept praying for safety and peace, trusting that God would see us through...

December:

Found our new apartment home! We met with our future landlords on the 15th and signed the lease and spent the next 4 days moving, with the help of my son Chris, his girlfriend and a couple of longtime friends. We were fully moved in on December 18.

On the 20th, a new friend, someone who read and followed my blog, contacted me to tell me she had seen our girls listed on another site! So, when Tony got home, I told him and we discussed it, for about one minute, and we knew we needed to start the process and go get them. WHAT A GREAT CHRISTMAS GIFT!!! Merry Christmas to us!!! Thank you Christine!

We had a quiet Christmas morning, missing our sons, hoping that next year we will have little ones again in our house to enjoy Christmas morning...then we spent the rest of the day at my parents house, enjoying a small Christmas there too. We really do hope next year is more noisy!

January:

Happy New Year!! Tony worked, I didn't do very much...

5th-asked for prayer for the future...received more response than expected. So blessed beyond words!

Pressure continues for Tony as he tried to turn his store around.

Still enjoying living in our new place!

February:

Early in the month, nothing to report.

Tony applied for quite a few jobs through the month, he receives a couple of call backs, two interviews. One job, at a dealership, seemed promising. It wouldn't be until March 19th. Tony would have loved to be out of Monro by the 16th because of the worsening pressure on him and other managers. We continued to pray.

Tony received a call for a second interview at the dealership on the 22nd, they wanted to hire him.

Saturday, 25th, Tony was laid off. Seems they wanted the store to become a million dollar store in less than 4 months...yeah, sure, in this economy? Good bye Monro...

The girls turned 9 years old on the 27th, Happy Birthday Sweethearts!!

29th-Happy Leap Day! Tony was told that they wanted him to start at the dealership but they had to find out exactly when the guy that Tony is replacing is leaving. They would let him know by the end of the week.

March:

Friday, 2nd, Tony was told he was starting his new job on March 12th! Praise God!!!


So...you are up to date! God is so Faithful! In a matter of a couple of months, we have a safe home, on a quiet street with nice landlords. Tony now has a new job! Here are the highlights of his new job:

He will work 44 hours a week, 4 days working with 3 days off- was working 65 hours with 1 1/2 days off. That means that he will be home enough to be a dad to them! And he has ALL holidays off!!!

He will make enough, like 'an additional income', as if I was working, which means I only have to focus on temp work to help bring the girls home. When they get here, I won't have to work so I can focus all my energy on them!

God is so full of Blessings! We are now focusing our prayers on starting the process to get those beautiful girls home...so they can know the love and blessing of a family! If you are a pray-er, please pray for us, and them!!

Thanks!!!

Whirlwind of Inactivity

Really, it has been. I know it sounds funny but that totally describes the last eight months of our lives...but this too will change soon.

So, I think I'm seeing a definite pattern in our lives here. Here is the short of it. Things are still changing, but for the better. We still need patience and all of your prayers...

We did finish the adoption/foster classes, while waiting for our license we realized we financially aren't prepare at the moment to bring kids into our family, so we are waiting, AGAIN. But slowly I'm realizing that it has to be in God's time, not mine. I see that a few short years ago we had a desire to adopt, and that desire has not left. We moved to Kentucky for seminary and he ended up not being able to attend due to calendar conflicts and finances. Tony tried to find a new job in Louisville after the economy took a nose dive in '08 but didn't find anything, so when the opportunity came up to go back to CT, he thought he was doing the right thing by taking a management job there. We are seeing now that that was probably not God's Plan but one of our own making. Since we've come back we don't feel like we belong here...kind of out of sync, bad timing if you will. We had been given some advice after we were in KY for a year, 'pray about it, but stay there and wait, it will work. We were sure that was God's Plan when we saw the timing of this move, you'll be fine. Stay and work it out.' Really wish we had listened.

So, the past month and a half, my mind has been playing tricks on me. When Tony and I are talking about going to a particular restaurant or store here in town, sometimes my mind visualizes that place in Louisville and I start thinking of driving, but not the streets here in CT but the ones in KY! Weird! I am beginning to feel a desire to be there, not here...that desire is what happened when we moved to KY the first time. We are feeling a pull/draw back, and we would not be upset with that change either!

So one Monday afternoon, about a week and a half ago, while I was sleeping off a migraine, Tony went on line, as usual lately, to look for a job. He did his usual search here in CT, didn't find anything different so he decided to search elsewhere...Tampa, near our son Austin, places in NC and Louisville, 'just for ha-ha's'. Well he applied for a job at a big tire retail company looking for management jobs in Louisville. He told me when I woke up. I said okay, let's see what God does with that one.

That Tuesday morning he called me from work to tell me he had just come off the phone with the hiring manager of that company he applied to, the guy, his name sounded familiar to both of us, was interest in him, he told him to send a resume and he'd get back to him. Tony sent him his resume that night and heard back from him the next day and told him to give him a call when Tony gets to Louisville for vacation, July 31-August 3!

Details, the manager is a member of a mega-church in Louisville, the company is not open on Sundays, there are 13 new stores under construction right now and each store employs at least 12 people. This guy is a real christian, Tony has had to work in at Monro anywhere from 1-3 Sundays a month which really crushes family time, and Tony shoulders almost the entire store, employing 4...and in CT's dying economy, he also shoulders the wrath of upper management of the chain which blames the manager, not the economy. No wonder the guy is losing weight and looks like he's 60 instead of his age!

We are seeing this as a positive change for us, and if this is the Plan that God has in store for us, we welcome it! Maybe we will be in a position to bring home a child or children in the foreseeable future? If that is really what God is going to do for us, we welcome that too! But I'm learning not to push my wants and desires on God, but to wait for Him to provide...so we feel like we're 'in sync' again!

Happy Mothers Day!!! Has It Been That Long...Really??

Happy Mothers Day to all you mothers that read my blog! I pray that your day was filled with love from your blessings!! My oldest son spent the day with Tony and I, and that hasn't happened in forever! My middle son, Austin, moved to Florida a week ago and that broke my heart. He surprised me with a beautiful bouquet of flowers he sent yesterday...I cried like a baby, but I'm better now. I miss him terribly but I am so happy that he is happy...that did my heart good. My baby called me and talked with me today...I miss him so much too. All in all, I had a good day!

Wow, it's been just about 2 months since I blogged last. We officially graduated our foster/adoption classes on May 3rd. Tony has his interview this Tuesday, and we are waiting for one more reference letter and our physicals to be sent into our licensing worker and then we are done. Soon to be licensed...finally!

We are getting bedrooms ready and such and will be in touch with another worker tomorrow. On top of being licensed domestically I still have a heart to adopt internationally. Hopefully I will find out if this license can be transferred to int'l...we'll see.

Well, I am getting tired, I think I'll get to bed so I can start bright and early on the rooms...still have lots to do before placement! Happy Mothers Day again!!!

Home Study Begins...

Well, we were able to get into a class and have had two classes so far. We had our social worker do a walk through and small interview on Tuesday afternoon and we were told that so far everything looks good. Things are still up in the air with the twins, but we feel like we are making head-way.

I really need to get children into this house, I am spending WAY too much time on facebook/farmville! It's fun, but I know I'd be happier with kids in this house with me! :)

We had company last Sunday, my oldest son and his friend and her 3 boys. Well Maddie was beside herself with happiness and excitement...she was so sad when they left, so I know she will love having kids in here with us all the time. What a great dog she is :)

Well, I just thought I'd pop in and let you all know what is going on here, in case you were wondering. Please pray with us for our future plans, adoption classes and everything that entails. We have a lot of planning coming up and this will all be challenging. Pray for clear direction for us and that we know what steps to take...thanks!

Well it has been quite a while and believe it or not, I'm still here. There have been many changes in my family and as well as other RR families. I am so excited that several of my friend have gone and brought their newest additions home, and I am extremely excited that one family has changed their minds and they are now in country visiting their new son, Nathan! It has been easier for us, over time, to face the fact that we have not been able to get our girls. We have not given up, we have talked about it til there was nothing more to say.

Since the economy is not helping us in any way to provide financially for a homestudy or any other obligation toward our adoption, I decided to become a licensed daycare provider in my home and any/all money I make goes directly to adoption funding. That is if there is a call for more daycare providers...we'll see.

We are also moving ahead to become license by the state to foster/adopt. We both feel that we are going to take steps, even baby steps, to get this going. My heart breaks for them, and any child that we could conceivably adopt, that they aren't home here with us and that precious time is being wasted.

Lets see...things that happened in two and a half months. Thanksgiving: had a nice time visiting with family. December 20th: picked up Cale from the airport for Christmas vacation. Had a wonderful time with him home...I miss having my children home. January: SuperBowl, and then had to put my wonderful black beauty bunny, Middie, to sleep...suddenly. That was crushing. Then I realized that time, precious time, is passing right before our eyes.

We are praying for God's timing in these plans. Our classes begin next Tuesday evening. Please pray with us that everything works out, I think I have a better shot at being licensed as a daycare provider at the same time we are going through our training classes.

Well, I'm heading to bed hopefully with wonderful dreams of filling our home with children again. Have a wonderful night, and please pray with us.

Letting Go...For Now...We Are Not Giving Up, Just Re-Grouping...

So, BIG DEEP BREATHE...I have had to do a lot of that lately. With frustration, pain, anxiety and much sadness...here goes...

First, a week ago our oldest son, Chris, came to church, which is not usual for him especially when he is working. He came to make sure he saw us because he needed to tell us that we are now grandparents of a 5 month old baby boy named Dillon. We don't know details and we are not even sure if we will ever be able to see him much less spend anytime with him. Yup, all of the above descriptive words, that is how I'm feeling. :( Letting Go...

Then, Austin, our middle son, told us on Monday night that he was moving out to live with friends across town. OMGosh...my one of my biggest fears became reality! This truly will be an empty nest as of Thursday night. Yup, all the above descriptive words again! :( More Letting Go...

Well, the biggest problem we are facing right now is our homestudy. We are facing a lot of pressure from the powers that be to finish the homestudy and get our USCIS approval. We are not concerned about passing our homestudy, and we never have been. our biggest challenge is the same now as when we first began, we need money to complete everything...and it's just not there. Tony's job really has messed him over big financially, so coming upon $2250.00 for a homestudy is no easy task. No one told him that if he became a manager he would take a cut in salary, and in this economy, there would be a small commission bonus, otherwise he wouldn't have accepted the offer. We have exhausted every avenue to secure that money but have been unsuccessful. Remember, we have always said, 'God's Will, God's Bill' and that if He wanted us to bring the beautiful princesses home He would make a way. Well, so far we have had nothing but trials. So...ALL OF THE ABOVE DESCRIPTIVE WORDS...AGAIN! And MORE Letting Go...

So, I am about to write a note to Andrea to release the twins to make them available for adoption. I am going to ask that she wait until Monday though. We are still going through with our yard sale and we are hoping to put up our FSP so people there will see that it's for real. The money made this weekend will be used toward our homestudy and if there is any extra, it will go to our USCIS application.

So with my broken heart in hand, I have been crying all week. Crying because I am a grandmother with no grandchild to show for it, and basically no hope to see him either.

I am also crying because I haven't been without children in my house in 28 years, and I am afraid of the quiet. I have always had a child's voice in the house with needs to be met, I was needed. Now what???

And crying because I have to, hopefully temporarily, let go of the dream of bringing home those beautiful twins that we have been posting all over our house and telling everyone about. Now what????

SO....here is the message...

I always thought that God was teaching me patience, and I think He still is, but He has added the part of 'Let Go and Let God'. I really have learned that God is in Control of ALL circumstances, but sometimes it's hard to move out of the way and let Him do what is necessary. I woke up thinking about this message this morning. God is in Control, including our grandson, our son wanting to grow up and do the natural thing, and to work through the details that will allow us to bring home the twins, or who ever God has deemed to be our newest child(ren). God is so Good, He really won't leave us on this walk...

So, here is the reality of our future.

At least we know about Dillon. All we can do is pray that his mother will allow his paternal grandparents visits now and then.

All of my children are gone from home, but they're not dead! I will have to be happy that we have a great relationship with them and they will be over once in a while.

While I am very sad about our 'empty nest', it will allow us to downsize to a 2 br apt or house to rent that costs less and WILL pass a homestudy inspection!

I was pretty amazed this morning when I woke up with all of this on my mind. God gave me those thoughts, I know, because I went to bed crying about all of the above and I actually woke with peace.

As far as letting Sandra and Slavka go, we aren't letting them go permanently, when the homestudy is complete we intend to commit to them again, if they are still available. We are certain we will complete our homestudy with flying colors, we just need to finance it. This is a temporary setback, we still love them and we are looking forward to the day we can bring them home.

So, please pray for us as we move forward, pray that the girls will still be available for us when we are finished, or that God protects our hearts if that is not to be so, and that He will show us who He has for us.

We are going to keep blogging, so please don't think this is the end. We still have fight left, and those girls are so worth it, as is any child that needs a home. Thanks for reading my blather, and please just keep us in your thoughts and prayers...Thank you! Have a blessed day!

Some Fairly Good News and...well...some other stuff...

I haven't been around much because I have been trying to get a blanket finished that I promised. Then, I have planned a Yard Sale and Kids Fun Day for Slavka and Sandra! Please Pray that everything comes together for November 6th, including weather :) I have also busied myself with another baby blanket to sell at the sale. I am really hoping to make enough to pay for our homestudy and USCIS. We'll see what happens.

One of my best friends, Nancy L, moved back home to CT from Tennessee earlier this month. Well, long story short, she and her sister have hired me part-time to sit with their dad during the day while everyone is out of the house. It will be used to help pay for things in our adoption, sooooo....I finally have a job. I am applying for another part-time job in retail too, and hopefully that will be enough to move our mountains...

We have been waiting for almost two months for Tony's HR department to move on this letter they were supposed to send us for our home study as well as to the girls country. Well, Tony made a series of phone calls and kept leaving messages, which were never returned. He finally just made a cover letter and faxed a form letter to HR and they actually responded....and they even notarized the letter! OMGosh I was blown away!!! Now we are sending it back to New York to have it apostilled...each little step brings us a little closer to them. Not fast enough for us, but apparently fast enough for God. He is the one that is moving the mountain of debt and paperwork in His Timing...not ours! Can't wait til we get those little ones...

Well, back to filling out applications for jobs...have a blessed day! :)

Doing More And More To Do...

Here is another seal from our state, we just had a couple of other documents apostilled and they just arrived...now if we could just hear from the foundations we applied to!

We really are still plugging along, hoping mountains will be moved for us to go forward.

We were told from someone who is going through the same thing we are that most people we know will not be the ones helping us through this, but it will be the kindness of strangers...

hmmmm...so far that is what we've seen. And those strangers that help may receive more of a blessing than those that don't.

God adopted the gentiles into his family which is a big example of what God wants of us and his plan...why is it most christians don't see that?

Oh well, enough pondering...I'm spending the next 6 hours applying on line for every seasonal job I can in that time... please pray that something (or 2) opens up for me! :)

Have a blessed and beautiful day~

Keeping Our Eyes On The Prize...

This adoption has had so many ups and downs and bumps...I feel like a milkshake! We are still plugging away, with the vision of my two girls in our arms, holding our hands through the airport on our way home...that is what I see and dream of the most! That is the 'Prize' on this journey, to be able to escort two beautiful little girls home, something my heart has wanted for a very long time!

I just sent off a couple more documents for apostilling, hoping for a quick turn around! We have also applied for two grants in the past two weeks. If you are a praying person, please pray for quick answers on those grants! They could be answers to a couple of our prayers...

I started an online fundraiser last week and finally figured out how to make it an 'event' on FaceBook. Every time I listed it, it got lost in the status/news updates...now it's an event that will be hard to ignore...I hope!

I'm having my grand opening Tupperware Party this Saturday. I sure hope I have a better turn out than I have had with my fundraiser so far...I am praying for success in this venture. It has the potential to make us pretty good money towards our adoption, as well as saving money for others!

I am open to starting an online fundraiser for you if you have the need. It's really pretty easy, it just requires participation from your friends and family! Email me kidz2luv@gmail.com and I'll explain it all out for you! I'd love to help...it'll keep me busy and out of trouble! :D

Have a great day!

I Can't Believe How Great It Feels!

I sent out my birth certificate to have it apostilled in the state I was born, Maine, last Thursday. It arrived on Friday, was apostilled and sent back out on Friday...and I received it YESTERDAY!!!

Here are the pics


























Isn't the Maine seal pretty???

We are making progress...can't wait to be done!!! Please pray for our grant applications. We know that God will provide :) But prayers sure do help!

Well, We're Still Plugging Along...

I have been spending time gathering info on grants that we may qualify for toward our adoption. So far I have three I am applying for. Hopefully we'll hear something positive. I am also trying to sell my hand made pins.

I have also, for the time being, signed up to be a Tupperware Consultant to help fund this adoption. Stay tuned, I'll be sure to post when things start heating up with parties! And yes, you guessed it, I still don't have a job :) But that's okay...

God's Will...His Bill. God will provide for this adoption, even if it's when we are about to travel...we just feel it :)

Keep tuning in, it can only keep getting better! I just ask you all to continue to pray! Thanks...

This Wait Is Over...For The Moment...

Apparently the company I applied to work for liked me but hired someone else, but...my staffing agent told me that they wanted him to keep in touch with me as they may hire me in the near future! The important thing is now I know where I stand. Time to move forward...

So, last night I went to visit a favorite cousin of mine through the years, Beth. She is very much a proponent of our adoption is now looking to do a party to help us fund-raise, as that maybe the only way for us to afford our home study and USCIS submission! Details will be shared in the future...

Beth, and her husband Kenny, threw ideas for fund-raising at me for a couple of hours last night and there were a couple of great ones! One is contacting an organization that gives grants for certain circumstances, so I am pleased to say I sent a note to them, so hopefully they will consider a grant to the twins fund! :)

Then Kenny mentioned running clubs for a walk/run for Reece's Rainbow awareness, I had never heard of running clubs, so I search for some on Google and found one here in our home town and a town over. I sent them emails asking if they would be able to help us to organize a run for the twins and to help RR!

My house work is backed up now because of this job hunt and fund-raising endeavor...but it'll be there when I'm done sending letters and emails! :D

Please, I am asking for prayer for our endeavor to fund-raise and bring our girls home...it may seem self centered, but this is their chance to have a loving home with a mommy and daddy, dog, bunny and BROTHERS...something they won't experience where they are now. Thanks! Have a great day!

Waiting...and waiting...and waiting...some more...part II

Okay, with the roller coaster ride of the day, I once again didn't hear anything from my staffing agent. So I called him at 4:30 this afternoon and left him a voicemail. Once again I don't know whether I have the job, but I am encouraged to have a wonderful husband to set things right in my mind. God really does match you up with the right mate for life. I can't thank God enough for him!

Tony told me that I have more competition this time looking for a job, and that the right job is out there for me...we will do whatever God wishes to raise awareness and raise the money to bring our princesses home, even if it means my not having a job. At least Maddie will be happy about me staying home...we have 'girl time' every morning while I eat breakfast. It's practice for when we bring the girls home! :)

Anywho...hopefully tomorrow's update will bring great news...don't worry girls, God will make a way! :D

Patiently Waiting...and waiting...and waiting...

So, I said hopefully next time I blogged I'd have news of a job, but I'm still playing the waiting game. A friend told me I've been waiting so long, I must be an expert...I think she's right! :) I told her I am going to write a book about waiting and invite many Reece's Rainbow families to send me their stories of waiting...might make the best seller list, maybe...

So, today is an upside-down day. Tony usually has Wednesday afternoon off and we do what we need to do and then chill. I can do everything I need to get done in the morning and be ready to go when he gets home. Today he had to work in the afternoon, and my mind and body is all confused! I have a lot to do today but I figured it will all be there when I'm done updating my blog!

We sent out seven letters yesterday to area churches about our adoption and advocation of Reece's Rainbow. Praying we hear from at least a few of them about what we are doing. It would be great if Tony got a chance to go speak at a couple of them to get the word out here in New England! Please pray for that...

Anyway, both interviews for the job went well, I'm just hoping and praying that the reason I haven't heard from my staffing agent is because he is checking on my job history and such. I guess if I don't hear from him by tomorrow morning, I'll be calling him. Gone are the days you are hired on the spot I guess! :P Oh well...

I guess I'll update you all tomorrow after I speak with the SA...all of your prayers are coveted!

I Guess...

I've taken far too long a vacation from this blog! I'm back and on my way out to my first interview in a year! I am so afraid to get excited, although I had a tough time sleeping last night thinking of the day we would go get our new daughters! :)

Hopefully the next blog will be that I have a job!!

Well...Finally!

We have finally decided on a homestudy provider, and are really excited to get started! We decided to change places because they seemed to take too long for just returning a simple phone call...and their web site seemed to be too interested in domestic adoption anyway, and almost to the point of trying to talk you out of international adoption. Oh Well...moving on now... :)

I had a really bad month last month with migraines and all, and then a stomach bug last week...yuk! But that is the way we are attacked, always with our health. So glad I'm feeling better.

Today I actually made red pepper relish! OMGoodness was it fantastic!!! I know what everyone is getting for christmas next year!! :)

Well, just thought I'd stick my nose in and let you all know we haven't fallen off the face of the earth...just needed time... Thank you all for hanging in there looking for us! Can't wait to go get our princesses!!!

Happy Fathers Day, And More...

I have to say this has been a tough month. Nothing too difficult, just lots of stuff...and tomorrow is Fathers Day!

Fathers Day is going to be rather melancholy for me. Tony is going to work because our sons are not going to be here, Chris is working, Austin is in Kentucky at a christian concert, and Cale is still in Kentucky, so Tony has no reason to be home...this year! :) He gave his assistant the day off so he could spend it with his little ones, and I'm just dreaming of next year when the girls will be bringing him breakfast in bed and then going to church with their new forever daddy! That is soo exciting! :D

Tomorrow is also a very important anniversary in our lives...June 20th was the day that Tony said I could look into Reece's Rainbow again, I did and saw these two beautiful faces looking back at me asking to come home. It's the day I texted Tony and asked if we could have two instead of one that they are twins, and he said sure write to Andrea and ask about them...so I did! Tomorrow is a very important day in our lives and the lives of our new girls. June 20th will always be a very important day to me, as will when we submitted our paper work to Andrea, our travel day, our gotcha day, the day the get home, their birthdays...our lives are about to change and we can't wait!!! :D

Well, I'm off to clean my house, again...I'd like to wish every dad that reads my blog an incredible Fathers Day!!!

Just A Quick Update...

I just wanted to share what I received for my birthday from my 96 year old grandmother, my kids call her bobche, which is polish for grandmother. She is the girls great grandmother. She told me she couldn't think of anything else she wanted to give me other than a hand made crocheted hat and scarf set and a hat with little ear covers for the twins! What a true blessing :) I have a set for each of them! What a wonderful birthday gift for me...

Have a wonderful day!

Getting more excited...

Okay, so I called our social worker and told her I was sending an email to her regarding scheduling our homestudy. That phone call was on Friday and I sent the email on Friday. Now I am sitting here on pins and needles waiting for the all important phone call...VERY EXCITED!

I have been sitting here ticking off the holidays before we bring our girls home. We have fathers day, 4th of July, Labor Day and, in the event that we can't travel in late October/early November, Thanksgiving! That should be it...VERY EXCITED!

Right now I'm getting ready to go away for 3 days to Rochester, NY for a Gifted Talented Conference. I've been going to these conferences with my friend Cindy for quite sometime now and really enjoy learning about the different games and curriculum that there is for children and deciding what curriculum and games to get for our girls when they come home. I'm looking forward to this weekend!

I'm also excited about weekends again because for 3 Sundays a month I have Tony back and we can go back to church as a couple! That is really exciting for me!!! This Sunday, one of my closest friends husband is going to take pictures of Tony and I so that we can have some semi-professional pictures of us for our profile and to send in a little book we are making and sending with another couple that we hope will be traveling in June! A book so the girls will recognize us when we arrive! And let them know we are their mommy and daddy and are coming to get them...we hope it all works out that way!

Well, gotta go do some laundry and pack for the weekend. Hopefully I'll blog some more before we leave on Thursday. Have a blessed week!

Well, It's Official...

Tony went to work yesterday afternoon and took over as the new manager! He really likes his new staff, and he actually was in a great mood when he got home :) He said the 30 minute ride home gives him time to unwind before he gets home...a plus for me!

His store isn't top in the market like the store he just left, but there is tons of room for improvement, so it could be a better store in a while. To put it differently, he won't be making the money we thought at first, but that's okay and here is why...

Remember my constant rant of not finding a job? Well please pay attention, this is really important and a lesson I'm learning along the way:

God is in the details. Did you get that? God is in the D E T A I L S...that's right! So this whole time, God was planning for Tony to be promoted giving us just about the right amount, nothing more and nothing less than what we will need. And that always seems to be His Way!

So now that I don't have a car during the day, because we need our car to last for a while, I will be able to do things at home instead of worrying about finding work and I'll be able to get paperwork done and prepare the bedroom for our twins...God has allowed me to stay home and be the stay at home mom that I have always felt called to be :)

Well, I have alot of things I need to do, especially call to schedule our HOMESTUDY!!! Plus some other not so fun things like clean the bathroom, do laundry and wash the floors :( But all the while I'll be thinking of my girls...can't wait to add homeschooling to my list of things to do! :)

Have a wonderful day!

Well, Kind Of A Big Day...

Let me back-track a bit...Our week started off with some so-so news. It seems that the country that we are adopting from closes down for summer vacation from July to September. Well at first I wasn't too happy, but as I started to think about it, that actually works in our favor. At the time of that news, I was feeling pressure to get things in gear and find a job (no pressure at all right?), and start planning and trying to get everything done...blah blah blah. Well, suddenly I realized I had a timeline and my brain cleared and it is clear as a sunny day. So I now can truly say that we should be traveling in October. So then today...

My day started off like most others, trying to get motivated to do something. That is difficult when you start your day with a migraine. Then it got interesting...

Tony called me about 10:30 to ask me to pray for him. Hmmm, not an unusual request, but different because he said he was going to get a visit from his Regional Market Manager. Well he didn't know what to expect, except that he was going to be given his own store! Yes, ordinarily a great thing...but under the present circumstances it could be a tumultuous situation.

Well, he had his visit and was given a store about 20 miles from here, which will necessitate a move to another town, which we may or may not do right away. We have already started our adoption paperwork here so we may just complete the adoption and move later on...still on the fence about that one.

He becomes a manager tomorrow. Along with additional hours, he will have 3 Sundays off a month (up until now he has worked almost every Sunday since last October :( ) so we can go back to attending church again, YAY, he will receive a commission on sales every paycheck and he will receive a quarterly bonus! That is the biggest news! I don't have to find a job and we will be able to move forward without fundraising for our initial fees anymore!!!! So now when people want to donate, we can direct them to our FSP so their donations are tax deductible. Then we are going to have business cards printed with the picture of our button of our twins, with our fs page and blog address to hand out to everyone and anyone who wants to see.

Our very next adoption item is our home study fee and passports which I can proudly say we can provide for those fees...we'll just have to fundraise for 12,000.00-13,000.00 for all of our other fees!!!

So, as long as things goes forward as was told to Tony today, tomorrow afternoon I will be calling to schedule our homestudy for late in June! And then we have all of our other paper monster to plan for....OMGOSH! This could really be happening....AAAAAAGGGGHHHH...Going to bed now, I can't believe what tomorrow can mean...time to dream of finally bringing our beautiful girls home forever! :)

God's blessings...

What A Beautiful Service

I just finished watching Chrissie's Celebration of Life Service a while ago. She was a beautiful princess that finally found her forever family. It was a blessing to hear about her and the story that her mother, Lorraine, told about her adoption, the joy and happiness Chrissie 'Jewel' brought to the family and the decisions they had to make regarding surgery and treatment. It really was a uplifting time.

As much as I am saddened by her passing, I can't help but feel some joy that someday soon we will see her again, this time in person, watching her dance and jump, run and play. She has been totally restored to her original splendor which God intended, and I'm sure she will still 'be the boss'!

I am grateful to the Patterson family for sharing their Serbian Sensation with the world, during the hospital stay and today for her Celebration into life. The love they all have for their princess was very evident in the service today. I am honored I was able to attend, even 2000 miles away. God has gifted everyone with many blessings today, I just pray that others can see that.

Well I'm off to spend time with hubby. I pray that you will have a God Bless evening too.

Barbara Christyn Joy Patterson

I took a few days off to just re-evaluate things and returned to my email group for Reece's Rainbow and facebook only to find out that our beloved Chrissie had passed away early Wednesday morning. My heart is broken for Chrissie's family right now. There is nothing more to say.

Click on the title of this blog and it will bring you to Lorraine's blog for Chrissie.

I'll blog again soon, just not now, I'm just too sad.